Come along, Elizabeth! We mustn't dawdle we can't be late. Galantry isn't dead. Come, come now we mustn't be late. This must be the extra military stationed here in Meryton. Leftenant Danny! Who is that with him? Lydia Bennet and Ms. Katherine Bennet, Leftnenant Wickham. He's just been assigned to our Meryton regiment to deal with the zombie resurgence.
I bet your fearful handsome in your regimens. Jane and Elizabeth Bennet, - May I introduce-. He's a Leftenant. This is our cousin Mr. Parson Collins. Aren't we overdo at the Phillips? Walk us? I fear I have a prior engagement. Yes, enchanted! She is baking, so we mustn't be late. I said she is baking. I was very keen to be on time. But it is apparent that Aunt Phillips muffins are splendid you see. Is that so? You know I and Lady Catherine abhor tardiness and actually it has instilled me with a real sense of order.
Thank you for accompanying us. And enduring my younger sisters. It's my pleasure. Are you going to be stationed here all winter, Mr. Well that depends entirely what the enemies have in store for us, Ms. We were just on our way to Longbourn! Bingley you promised you'd throw a ball at Netherfield. Then I shall begin preparations immediately the most glorious ball Hertfordshire has seen. Can Leftenant Wickham come?
An invitation shall sent to all my fellow officers. Excuse me. Good day, Jane. There you are my beautiful nieces! Please join us Mr.
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No, duty calls I'm afraid. I must know Mr. What is amiss between you and Mr. Are you much acquainted with him? More than I wish to be. He's been here for less than a month and already the least popular man in the county.
Yes it always gives me great pain to see him. I've been connected to his family since infancy. My father managed the late Mr. Darcy's estate Darcy and I grew up together. His father treated me like a second son. I cannot begin to do justice to his kindness. He bequeathed me with the best living and his gift. I had my heart set on joining the church. But when he was slain in the 2nd battle of Kent, Darcy ignored his wishes and gave my living to another man.
What could've induced him to pay you so cruelly? He thought me too low to be worth his consideration. I loved his father dearly so I can never expose Darcy or challenge him to a duel. Come now, Lizzy. We must plan our trip to the North Gantry. I'll be right there. Well perhaps I shall see you at Mr. Bingley's Ball. I'll be there. I oughta think that Mr. Darcy's presence would keep you away. If Mr. Darcy wishes to avoid me he must go, not I.
I have found you Ms. Sorry, and you are? Aku ingat. Wickham I never Bennet's I do hope you haven't forgotten our dance? Of course not, Parson Collins. Oh, allow me. Thank you, Mr. Lady Catherine herself has praised me on my lightness of foot. Wonders to how you found the time to hone such delicacy in your step. Flattery will get you everywhere, Ms.
The dance seems to be getting away with us. I think it only right and proper that every clergymen should set the example for matrimony in the parish.
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This is my favorite moment in the dance! The non partisan full swing! Such splendor in the air! Collins please keep your voice down. Splendid, splendid work everyone! Thank you for your attention. Everyone did valiantly.
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Bennet it is my intention to remain very close to you throughout all the evening. Darcy this is Mr. Perhaps my cousin. Darcy I have made the most incredible discovery No, tushAn extraordinary discovery sir. You are the nephew of Lady Catherine de Bourgh. I know. Well, I know you know. Such a charming young man! He's so- well rich!
Jane marrying Bingley is bound to throw her sisters in the way of others. Rich men, and then-! Mother, it's time to go! Don't be so impertinent! Darcy overheard you. Who is Mr. Darcy to me pray that I should be afraid of him? I can't find Papa or Lydia anywhere! Papa will be in the library and I'll find that stupid girl! Edwin, where is dessert? Beacham's servants. How did you get in here? Our new friend showed us the way in! Was he bitten? No, he fell and hit his head! Your ability as a warrior are beyond reproach Mr. If only you were as good a friend.
Dear Jane, we've decided to close down Netherfield and return to London. We're not sure when we shall return. The Bingley's just closed down the house and left? I don't understand. Why would he not know when he is to return? According to Caroline Bingley, Mr. Darcy is impatient to see his sister. My brother admires her greatly already.
Who will now be seeing her frequently and on the most intimate footing. Am I wrong my dearest Jane, in indulging the hope of an event which will secure the happiness of so many. Obviously she knows her brother is in love with you And wants him to marry Ms. Bingley truly loves me, nothing can keep us apart. No one who has ever seen you together can doubt his affection. I'm sure Mr.
Bingley will be back soon.
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And that there's a good reason for all this. Good morrow. Collins would like a private audience with your sister. Miss Elizabeth As soon as I entered the house I singled you out as the companion for my future life. I am convinced marrying you will add very greatly to my happiness. But actually I must add- I will of course require you to retire your warrior skills as part of the marital submission. We absolutely can't have swords in the home. But now, Miss Elizabeth. But allow me to assure you in the most animated language of the violencethe sheer violence of my affection.
Sir, I'm honored by your proposal. But I regret I must refuse. Lizzy, I insist you marry Mr. Do not worry Mr. Collins she shall be brought to reason Oh good!
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Oh, no I'm terribly sorry. Lizzy, Lizzy. You will marry Mr. Collins or I shall never speak to you again! You talk to her. An unhappy alternative is before you. Your mother will never speak to you again if you do not marry Mr. And I will never speak to you again if you do. Who will maintain you when your father is dead? No one! You shall become a poor and pathetic spinster! Anything is to be preferred or endured rather than marrying without affection! Lizzy don't go into the woods alone! I forbid you! You vanished at the Ball. I thought it would be selfish of me to seek an encounter with Mr.
Would've ruined the Ball for anyone who witnessed it. I am very sorry I lost the pleasure of dancing with you though. Did you happen to see four gentlemen pass this way? In top hats? You saw them? But they were undoubtedly Pall Bearers. This is a cemetery. Oh, Ms. I want to take you somewhere very special to me. It's a secret place I've never shown another living soul.
I stumbled upon it by accident when I was first stationed in the "inbetween" But somehow I believe I was always destined to find it, Ms. You go in. I'll join you after I seat my horse. Don't be afraid. I'm not. You're quite rude! It's alright. Yet all of them go forth marching anywhere. You have nothing to fear. You see if they never consume human brains they will never fully transform into zombies. Lazarus' is the key to find the ending the struggle between the living and the undead. We must force some kind of understanding with the most advanced among them. Surely the crown will support such a venture.
The war has almost bankrupted Great Britain. I don't know where to turn. It's only a matter of time before they outnumber us. I didn't know you were coming to visit. I have some news. I'm engaged to be married to Mr. You must be surprised. I'm not, I'm relieved. I believe my chances of happiness with him is as fair as most women can hope for. And that's what you expect? Twenty five is more than I expect. Charlotte, if you're happy for you, then I am too. Collin's rectory I will require a chaperone. I'll come. Now when we meet Lady Catherine, a simply curtsy will suffice.
Maintain eye contact but don't speak unless spoken to please. Lady Catherine's favorite Black Guard. They can't move. Look at this you can tickle him with a feather. An extraordinary sight is it not? Oh, such splendor! Lady Catherine's "Smiting the Undead" which is so majestic. The Four Horsemen of the Zombie Apocalypse. When they're there, the end of days is nigh. This way, please. Lucas and Ms. Lady Catherine?
Miss de Bourgh? Lady Catherine. So you are Elizabeth Bennet. Yes, I am your ladyship. This is my daughter. Well it's very kind of you to invite us over for tea Lady Catherine, really. Very grateful. You know my nephew? Yes I had the tremendous pleasure of meeting him in Hertfordshire. Is this the soldier you spoke of? Yes, Ms. Bennet requested he attend that he might confer with your ladyship about a strategy with which to combat the scourge.
A Leftenant? And tea is brought up. Shall we? Delighted to. I have given you entrance to the wealthiest woman in the kingdom. The rest is up to you. Your ladyship has perhaps heard some of the stricken have not succumbed to the urge to feed upon the living. And in so doing have maintained their human ways.
And they've managed to resist this most primal of zombie urges how? Their ironclad constitutions? Yes, fortified by religious piety and pig's brains. Which they receive in communion as the blood of Christ. The pig's brains quench their apetite for human brains. Ah, yes of course. The crown's funds have been drained.
You are here to solicit money? I'm here to propose a venture that would end the war forever. These new zombies can be reasoned with. With the proper funding I believe we can cultivate trust and even good will with this new iteration of undead. Who seem to possess an inherent power over the lower ranks of their kind. Zombie aristocrats? I prefer to think of them as souls lost in purgatory. The common hordes look to them for leadership. It takes just one of them to realize their power and to lead their hordes into battle- The undead are like locusts. They go forth and destroy.
They have no use for leaders. Oh, except one actually. According to the Book of Revelation actually the anti-christ shall lead the undead. On the day that shall be the last day of mankind. How cheery Collins. Thank you Lady Catherine, Franklin are there more scones?
Well then the human race is surely doomed. Your ladyship the undead will always multiply faster than the living and procreate. Nine months to make a baby then 16 years to make a soldier and one raw second to make a zombie. You must realize if they were to organize we cannot defeat them. The only hope is to find a way to coexist with them. Before they find their anti-christ. The late Mr. Darcy would have supported such a venture.
I have tolerated your presence here long enough, Wickham. Please do remember this moment. And the opportunity you so glibly spurned. The day of the zombie is already brokered. Wake and face the light or slumber into oblivion. Darcy, you are as unfeeling as the undead. My word. You give your opinion very decidedly for so young a person.
Indeed Lady Catherine. Well I would like to say how dutifully behaved I think Lady Anne has been this morning. A real credit to the crest actually. Would you like a scone, dear? I didn't mean to frighten you. You didn't. No, of course not. Rosings is the safest place in England. You see that's the problem. I wish those feel invincible within their great houses but how wrong they are. Their hubris will be their downfall. You act as if the undead have already defeated us. I think you and I understand each other Elizabeth. By the way you championed me earlier, I thought.
Darcy's treatment of you has been utterly despicable. No more despicable than his treatment of you and your family. I don't understand you sir. It was Darcy that persuaded Bingley to stay clear of your sister and leave Netherfield. Because he believe your sister to be inferior to his friend. Darcy also convinced Bingley that she was after his fortune and doesn't really love him. How could you possibly know this? Men talk. Darcy brags about it with his intimates. Bennet, run away with me.
You have crossed a line, sir. We're far beyond lines now, Ms. Take you to the pasture Ms. Bennetday of reckoning is upon us. You've finally arisen. How fortuitous. There are some words, I must say. Please do be seated. Bennet although I know many consider you to be decidedly inferior. As a matter of your birth, family and circumstances. My feelings will not be repressed. In vein, I struggled. I've come to feel for you a most ardent admiration and regard which has overcome my better judgment.
So now I ask you most fervently to end my turmoil and consent to be my wife. Bennet and Lady Catherine — whom represent the silly and the pretentious, respectively. The acting in the play is uniformly first-rate, funny and charming. Bennet Nicholas Hormann and Carr are especially hilarious and well-suited to their parts. They both have brilliant comedic timing, particularly Carr. The adaptation stays very true to the original novel, lifting direct passages of both narration and dialogue, but is compressed to be only about two hours long.
The fact that the actors have to speak into one of the many microphones on stage restricts the possibilities for blocking in the piece, and means that they have to get creative in the movements that are possible. For example, when Mr. Darcy and Lizzy are dancing, very little dancing is actually happening on stage because they are also talking.
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On the other hand, when Mr. Darcy confesses his love for Lizzy, because of his excitement and eagerness, he gradually jumps from the furthest microphone from Lizzy to the closest. As the tension increases, the distance between their microphones decreases. The microphone situation has other curious side effects, such as the fact that sometimes the actors are looking not at each other, but rather unnaturally out into the audience.
These things add to the disconnection from realism that the style of the play created. Throughout most of the play, the comedy is the main focus, with the drama largely taking a secondary role. This seems to be a good call: In one performance, the audience was extremely reactive to this, constantly laughing, applauding, ooh-ing, and aah-ing. Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read. Want to Read saving…. Want to Read Currently Reading Read. Other editions. Enlarge cover. Error rating book. Refresh and try again. Open Preview See a Problem? Details if other :.
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